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Journeys of Becoming...

What To Do When You’ve Fallen Out Of Love With Your PhD

April 25, 2024 · PhD & Beyond

Pursuing a PhD while juggling the responsibilities of motherhood is a monumental undertaking that demands unwavering dedication, intellectual prowess, and relentless passion. However, along this intricate journey, there may come a time when you fall out of love with your PhD, and the fire that once fuelled your research starts to dwindle. You may find yourself grappling with a sense of disconnection, disillusionment, or lack of inspiration for your academic pursuits.

If you’re a Scholarly Mama navigating the challenging terrain of the PhD rollercoaster, know that you’re not alone. In this blog post, we’ll explore constructive ways to reignite your passion for your PhD journey and embrace your unique blend of scholarly and motherly roles.

By the way, if you’d like to tune into the related podcast episode on this topic using the player below:

Acknowledging Your Feelings When You’ve Lost the PhD Passion

The first step in navigating a dwindling passion for your PhD journey is acknowledging and accepting your emotions. Feeling disconnected or disenchanted with your research is a common experience, but understanding that it’s okay to feel this way and that it doesn’t diminish your capabilities, commitment, or dedication is crucial.

Reflecting on the Source of Falling Out of Love with Your PhD

Take a moment to reflect on the underlying reasons for your diminishing passion and falling out of love with your PhD. Were external pressures, personal challenges, or misalignment with your research topic contributing to this feeling? Identifying the root cause can offer clarity on the next steps you need to take to rekindle your love for your PhD.

Embracing Self-Compassion When Out of Love with Your PhD

As a Scholarly Mama who has fallen out of love with her PhD, the expectations and demands placed upon you are manifold. Embrace self-compassion by acknowledging the multifaceted nature of your life. Allow yourself to prioritise self-care without guilt. Remember, real life is multidimensional – you’re not just a scholar but also a mother, partner, and so much more.

Seeking New Perspectives to Fall Back in Love with Your PhD

Exploring new perspectives can breathe fresh life into your research and help you fall back in love with your PhD. Engage with diverse scholarly works, attend conferences, or collaborate with peers. Sometimes a change in approach or exposure to different viewpoints can allow you to appreciate and reignite your passion for your research.

Considering a Pause or Restructure When Out of Love with Your PhD

Contemplating a temporary break or restructuring your academic routine is not a sign of weakness when you’ve fallen out of love with your PhD. Communicate openly with your supervisor about your feelings and explore possibilities for how your schedule can be tweaked or adjusted to align with your priorities and reignite your passion.

The Benefits of Maternity Breaks When Out of Love with Your PhD

For many Scholarly Mamas who have fallen out of love with their PhD, maternity breaks can serve as an opportunity to recharge, recentre, and remember the reasons behind their academic pursuits. These breaks can be lifesavers, allowing you to return to your PhD with renewed energy and motivation, potentially falling back in love with your research.

Connecting with Fellow Scholarly Mamas

Connecting with other Mamas pursuing PhDs who experienced this and overcame it, can be a game-changer. By engaging with those who truly understand the unique challenges of balancing academia and motherhood, you’ll realise you’re not alone. This shared experience can help reignite your passion and provide valuable insights into navigating this path successfully.

Discovering Your Purposeful Scholarly Mama Trait to Rekindle Love for Your PhD

Each Scholarly Mama has a unique “purposeful Scholarly Mama trait” that can help them feel less overwhelmed and more fulfilled on their journey, even when they’ve fallen out of love with their PhD. By discovering this trait through our 3-minute quiz, you can gain valuable insights into setting goals aligned with your unique strengths, further fuelling your passion and purpose for your research.

Embrace the Journey, Even When Out of Love with Your PhD

Remember, your PhD is only one small part of a longer, beautiful journey that embodies resilience and strength. Your dedication to both academia and motherhood is commendable, and embracing this phase as an opportunity for self-reflection and growth can help your passion for your PhD flourish once again.

Conclusion

Navigating the PhD journey as a Scholarly Mama is no easy feat, and it’s natural to experience periods of disconnection or disillusionment along the way. However, by acknowledging your feelings, reflecting on the root causes, embracing self-compassion, seeking new perspectives, considering pauses or restructures, and connecting with fellow Scholarly Mamas, you can reignite your passion and continue your journey with purpose and fulfilment. Remember, your journey as a Scholarly Mama is a testament to your perseverance, and nurturing your passion is key to embracing the beautiful blend of academia and motherhood, even when you’ve fallen out of love with your PhD.

Remember, Scholarly Mamas, these are our journeys of becoming!

Sending you lots of love and gratitude,

Signature | Mrs Mummy PhD
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Meet Mrs Mummy PhD®

Hey! I'm Dr Michelle Gibbs and this little corner of the internet exists to help ambitious Mamas like you, achieve your life and academic goals without sacrificing what matters most. If you're juggling family, career, academia and everything else in-between, then it's time to say 'yes' to savouring the moments that truly matter, while doing what sets your heart on fire! So Mama, are you in? Fabulous! These are our journeys of becoming :-)

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