Being a Mama on a doctoral journey is like piloting a plane that feels impossibly heavy. You’re sitting at the gate, knowing you need to take off, but the weight of responsibilities makes even the smallest movement feel overwhelming. The inertia is both palpable and stressful. That’s exactly where I found myself in January 2022, returning from maternity leave with my third child and staring down a critical PhD submission deadline just 16 months away. In this blog post, I will share how I finished my PhD thesis on part-time hours as a Scholarly Mama.
Let me paint you a picture: scattered thesis chapters, a new baby starting nursery (and catching every illness under the sun), two other children needing attention, and a 100,000-word thesis that needed to come together before May 2023. The weight of seven years of PhD work sat heavily on my shoulders, and I was this close to sending that dreaded email to my supervisors – the one that would end my PhD journey once and for all.
By the way, if you prefer to listen to my story about how I finished my PhD thesis as a Mama of 3 in podcast format, please tune into the Mrs Mummy PhD® Podcast wherever you usually get your podcasts or tune in using the player below:
The Breaking Point
Coming back from maternity leave to your PhD isn’t just challenging – it’s like trying to push back a commercial aircraft with your bare hands. During my leave, I’d made the conscious choice to focus entirely on healing from my third C-section and bonding with our newest addition. While I don’t regret that decision for a second, it meant facing a complete disconnect from my PhD work when I returned.
The overwhelm hit hard. I missed my first mini-deadline after returning, and that feeling of failure nearly convinced me to quit. Every Scholarly Mama knows that moment – when the cursor blinks mockingly on your laptop screen during that precious naptime window, and you wonder if you’re disillusional for trying to juggle it all.
The Turning Point: Operation PhD Thesis
Instead of sending that resignation email, I took a step back. One thing I’ve learned through my Scholarly Mama journey is that when your brain is stressed and overwhelmed, it’s not the time to make life-changing decisions. So I gave myself space to think clearly and strategise.
What emerged was what I purposefully called “Operation PhD Thesis” – not just a catchy phrase, but a comprehensive strategy that would transform my journey from overwhelmed to successfully submitted. On February 10th, 2022, I sent my supervisors an email with this exact title, laying out my purposeful plan for completion.
Years after I finished my PhD thesis by implementing “Operation PhD thesis“, I believe this approach is still capable of equally purposeful transformation. This is why I have created my brand new 8-week virtual writing retreat for Scholarly Mamas based on this exact strategy, called Scholarly Mamas® – OPT. If you’re a Scholarly Mama feeling overwhelmed by your doctoral thesis writing journey, I hope this blog offers hope and practical insights for moving from stuck and stressed to successfully submitted. Scholarly Mamas® OPT will provide the space, strategy, and support to help you write your first or next 10,000 words in just 8 weeks without sacrificing family time.
Join the waitlist today!
Building Sustainable Momentum
Think back to that airplane metaphor. A successful takeoff doesn’t happen instantly – it requires building momentum gradually until you reach that point of no return. That’s exactly how I approached my thesis writing:
- Acknowledged the reality of my situation
- Created systems that worked with family life, not against it
- Built sustainable habits and contingency plans that could weather the storms of sick kids and sleepless nights
- Focused on consistent progress rather than speed
The Results Speak For Themselves: I Finished My PhD Thesis
Not only did I successfully submit my PhD thesis on May 5th, 2023 (just days before my final deadline), but I achieved something I never thought possible during those dark days of doubt:
- Passed my viva with no compulsory amendments
- Won an outstanding PhD thesis prize
- Maintained my family life throughout the process
- Created a system that actually worked for a Mama of three like me
Key Lessons Learned As I Finished My PhD Thesis
1. Embrace the Unique Journey
Being a Scholarly Mama means your PhD journey won’t look like everyone else’s – and that’s okay. Locking yourself away for months to write simply isn’t realistic when you’re juggling nappy changes, kids’ timetables and school runs.
2. Build Sustainable Systems
Success isn’t about writing faster or working harder – it’s about creating systems that work with your life as a Mama. This means:
- Planning around family commitments
- Making the most of small pockets of time
- Building in buffer weeks for inevitable life challenges
- Creating sustainable habits rather than unsustainable sprints
3. Find Your Community
The lonely road is the hard road. While you can certainly complete a PhD on your own, having support from others who understand your unique challenges makes the journey not just easier, but more enjoyable.
Moving Forward: Your PhD Journey
If you’re reading this and feeling that familiar weight of overwhelm, know that you’re not alone. Whether you’re returning from maternity leave, juggling multiple children, or just starting your PhD journey as a Mama, remember that feeling ready is a myth – in both motherhood and PhD life.
Sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is simply start. Take that first step, however small it might seem. Remember that your journey doesn’t have to mirror anyone else’s – what matters is finding a path that works for you and your family.
The transformation from feeling stuck to successfully submitting your PhD thesis isn’t about working yourself to exhaustion or sacrificing your family time. It’s about creating a sustainable approach that honours all parts of your life – your academic goals, your family commitments, and your well-being.
Final Thoughts
Your PhD journey as a Mama might feel like that heavy aircraft at the gate right now, but with the right strategy and support, you can build the momentum needed for takeoff. The key isn’t in working harder – it’s in working smarter, living with more intention, and creating systems that support both your academic and family life.
Remember, you don’t have to choose between being a good Mama and successfully submitting your PhD thesis. With the right approach, you can honour both roles while creating a journey that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.
Whether you’re just starting your PhD journey or approaching that final submission deadline, know that it’s possible to get from where you are to where you want to be. It might take 16 months, like it did for me when I finished my PhD thesis, or it might take longer – what matters is that you’re moving forward with purpose and intention.
Keep showing up for yourself, one word at a time. Your journey of becoming Dr [insert your name here] is worth every step.
Until next time, I’m sending you lots of love and gratitude,
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