If you’re a Scholarly Mama® pursuing a PhD while juggling motherhood and other responsibilities, you may find yourself feeling unfulfilled at times. Despite the incredible opportunity of higher education and the privilege of being a mother, many Scholarly Mamas® experience a sense of emptiness or dissatisfaction. Feeling unfulfilled can stem from various sources, but a timeless saying may hold the key to rediscovering purpose and joy in your journey.
By the way, if you could want to listen to the related podcast episode for this blog post, feel free to tune in using the player below:
The Squeaky Wheel Gets The Oil If You’re Feeling Unfulfilled
Growing up, you may have heard the saying, “the squeaky wheel gets the oil.” This phrase, often used to encourage speaking up or advocating for oneself, can also offer valuable insight into dealing with feeling unfulfilled as a Scholarly Mama®.
As a Scholarly Mama®, you wear multiple hats – researcher, student, mother, partner, and more. Each of these roles requires investment of your time, energy, and attention. However, it’s easy to become so laser-focused on your academic pursuits that you neglect other crucial areas of your life, leading to a sense of imbalance and feeling unfulfilled.
The saying “the squeaky wheel gets the oil” serves as a reminder to listen to the areas of your life that are “squeaking” – the relationships, self-care practices, or personal goals that are being overlooked or neglected. Just as a squeaky wheel needs lubrication to function properly, these neglected aspects of your life require your intentional investment to thrive.
Auditing Your Investments If You’re Feeling Unfulfilled
To overcome feelings of unfulfillment, it’s essential to take stock of where you’re investing your time and energy. Often, we make micro-decisions throughout the day about how we allocate these precious resources, whether intentionally or by default.
If you find yourself pouring all your efforts into your research or academic work, it’s no wonder you may feel unfulfilled in other areas of your life. While being a good researcher is undoubtedly important, you are more than just your PhD. You are a multifaceted individual with various roles and responsibilities, each deserving of your attention and nurturing.
By auditing your investments and identifying the “squeaky wheels” in your life, you can make conscious choices to reallocate your time and energy toward the areas that truly matter to you. This could mean strengthening relationships with your partner or children, prioritising self-care activities, or pursuing personal passions outside of your academic work.
Achieving Holistic Growth and Fulfilment
Investing in all areas of your life is crucial for achieving holistic growth and fulfilment as a Scholarly Mama®. Just as a well-oiled machine runs smoothly, when you intentionally nurture and invest in all aspects of your life, you create a harmonious blend that allows you to thrive in every role you occupy.
Neglecting certain areas may seem like a temporary sacrifice, but over time, this neglect can lead to those areas becoming rusty or even grinding to a halt. This not only impacts your overall well-being but can also hinder your ability to achieve your academic goals and experience true Scholarly Mama® joy.
By listening to the squeaks and oiling those metaphorical wheels, you’re proactively maintaining and nurturing the various dimensions of your life. This could involve setting boundaries to protect your time, prioritising self-care practices, or simply being more intentional about how you allocate your energy.
Remember, the concept of “work-life balance” may be misleading, as different areas of your life may require varying levels of attention at different times. The key is to remain attuned to the squeaks and be willing to adjust your investments accordingly, ensuring that no area is consistently neglected.
Embracing Change and Intention When Feeling Unfulfilled
Overcoming feelings of unfulfillment as a Scholarly Mama® requires embracing change and approaching your journey with intention. It’s easy to fall into patterns of neglect, but breaking free from those habits starts with awareness and a commitment to prioritising what truly matters to you.
This may involve challenging societal norms or personal beliefs about what it means to be a successful scholar or mother. It could mean redefining success on your own terms, encompassing not just academic achievements but also personal fulfillment and well-being.
Ultimately, navigating the Scholarly Mama® journey requires flexibility, adaptability, and a willingness to continuously reassess and realign your investments. By listening to the squeaks, oiling the metaphorical wheels, and making intentional choices about how you allocate your time and energy, you can experience purposeful success and scholarly joy while honoring all aspects of your multifaceted life.
Conclusion
If you’re a Scholarly Mama® feeling unfulfilled, the saying “the squeaky wheel gets the oil” may hold the key to rediscovering purpose and joy in your journey. By auditing your investments, identifying the areas that require nurturing, and intentionally allocating your time and energy, you can achieve holistic growth and fulfillment.
Remember, you are more than just your PhD – you are a multidimensional individual with various roles and responsibilities. Embracing this truth and being willing to make adjustments will not only enhance your overall well-being but also contribute to your success as a scholar and a mother.
So, listen to the squeaks, oil those wheels, and embark on a journey of intentional living, where every aspect of your life receives the attention and nurturing it deserves. By doing so, you’ll not only stop feeling unfulfilled but also create a life that feels as good on the inside as it appears on the outside.
Remember Mama, these are our journeys of becoming.
Sending you lots of love and gratitude,
But all jok
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